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04-04-2004, 03:18 PM
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It's already time for us elitist Habs fans to take defensive measures against the Bs!

Valiant members of this community, I salute you.

Thee have achieved a remarkable job at holding the fort all season long, analyzing the Canadiens from all angles imaginable (however stupid and meaningless some might have appeared to the foreigner; one needs to point no farther for an example than the in-depth evaluation of Joe Juneau's intelligence) and keeping the faith that the season would last longer than that of the Expos', even after and despite all of Andreas Dackell's shortcomings. Yet, I have to announce you, I am afraid that your duty is far from being completely filled.

Indeed, starting from this afternoon, a black, white and yellow shade has been glooming over our heads, and obscuring our hopes of rejoicing. It appears that, in a short term future, hordes of thirsty-for-blood, child-eating sycophants (also known as Bruins fans)will invade our much-beloved land and turn it into ruins; will affect our health, and turn it into agony; and, even more worrying, will crush our hope and turn it into despair. The danger, my good friends, is not only very real, but also imminent. Will we let ourselves be passed over like effeminate Greek poets?

Of course not. Well, ahem, at least I hope not. In times of near catastrophy, we need not to bow and suffer the pangs of destiny. We need to regroup. This forum, my friends, isn't going to go down without battling until its last resources are exhausted. And, not only shall we defend ourselves until the bitter end, but we shall also be victorious, and bring, in an imposing display of preventive action, the ruins to the land of these uneducated eunuchs (aka Bruins' fans). For, against a ruthless enemy, one needs to show even more ruthlessness. What will the difference be, then, you may ask, between them and us, a question to which I'd respond with an angry look: "Our cause, my brave knights, is just."

Therefore, here I constitute the official Bruins' bashing thread, which will be the sanctuary of all those willing to denigrate the Bruins, without falling in the mediocrity of name calling and mindless one-line remarks that we've seen too often during the past few months and years.

Be brave. Be courageous. Do never forget, this is civilization's last barrier against barbary we are now defending. For, yellow is a color that belongs only in a telephone directory, and not at the side of the Stanley Cup. Not to mention, the boys will be back before Christmas anyway.

Last edited by ShootOut: 04-04-2004 at 04:08 PM.
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