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08-22-2011, 03:27 AM
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12 (West). Colorado Avalanche

Not satisfied with trading Chris Stewart and Kevin Shattenkirk for No. 1 Overall Bust Erik Johnson, the Colorado Avalanche decided to move their guaranteed lottery pick in exchange a brittle goaltender with no real track record as a starter. This is a franchise clearly trying to destroy itself from within.

Up front, the Avalanche are an interesting team. At forward, they don't have any good players. On defense, they also don't have any good players. This team offends me. I find them obscene.

How much more mundane and bland can you get than Paul Stastny? He may have however many points at the end of a season, but has any Avalanche fan ever said "I have too much money, I want to waste large amounts of money to go see Paul Stastny play a game because he's boring and slow"? No. He is a waste of time. The diet iced green tea of NHL players.

Matt Duchene is not better than John Tavares and anybody who ever claimed otherwise clearly has a problem with looking at the big picture and should refrain from posting on the internet.

Milan Hejduk should have retired twenty years ago.

Aside from bust and future Erik Johnson, there's not much on defense. I am not sure who Matt Hunwick is and why he even exists. Shane O'Brien is a pathetic waste of life, and clearly would be beating his girlfriend in a trailer park somewhere if he wasn't mistakenly afforded the opportunity of playing hockey by some misguided soul. Kyle Quincey is another loser who HF nerds overrate because he was drafted by Detroit, as if Detroit doesn't have hundreds of busts just like every other team. Seriously, give it up, Jonathan Ericsson will never be a top-pairing defenseman.

The Avalanche play in the Pepsi Center, which is a perfect representation as both Pepsi and the Colorado Avalanche cause cancer.

I don't like this team and neither should you.

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