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10-02-2013, 04:37 PM
Lafleurs Guy
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Join Date: Jul 2007
Posts: 38,895
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Originally Posted by Lshap View Post
From experience, the best anti-kill antidote is to invite your wife to come. The invitation alone usually defuses suspicion and wins you a free-pass.

"Ah hey honey, want to drive to Montreal and watch a hockey game? But not AT the game, uh... at a bar."

"Are you out of your mind?"

"No really, it's going to be fun. Plus you know all that time I spend on the internet talking to people I don't know... they're all going to be there too!"

"You ARE out of your mind."

"Well, uh, all these people really like me and I think they'd really like you too."

"First off, they don't like you. I know they don't like you because I don't like you. They probably all want to kill you. The only reason you want me to come is because you don't want to die. And if I'm being honest, with the way you've let the house go lately, I'm considering killing you myself. Now go get the kids and BBQ us up some dinner..."

"Jackass" (Mumbled very quietly to herself)

"Yes dear."

Yeah, I'll get to work on this right away.

(Also as a sidenote, when I said I'd get killed, I meant other posters would kill me if they saw me there. I don't think there's a single person on this forum that I haven't pissed off. I'm pretty sure that I'd be quietly stabbed at some point during the evening.)

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