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The great Dallas Stars Free Agency MEGATHREAD

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08-04-2007, 01:43 AM
  #1
Alistar
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The great Dallas Stars Free Agency MEGATHREAD

some of you may remember last year I made a fan club for Jaroslav Modry at about this time of year, a fan club doomed to failure due largely to the number of Los Angeles Kings Trolls who infiltrated the thread and proclaimed loudly for all to hear that Modry was only worth the Jersey on his back and that his backwards ways would see us crippled defensivly. Now that Modry has moved on to Los Angeles I am afraid that I could not post the thread I had been designing all season with links to Youtube videos of every shift Modry took for the Stars, so in a moment of desperation I had to find a new idol for us to worship. Now this player will probably be unfamiliar to most of you - in fact some of you have probably never heard this name in your life but I am afraid it was the best I could do at short notice.

Antti Miettinen or lapaset as he is know in Finland - (probably Sweden and Norway too though I am not sure of the similarites in language between those 3 frozen wastelands) was born on July 4, 1980 - a day Americans will probably recognize as the Fourth of July. growing up in Hameenlinna he enjoyed a life of luxury and excess, as evidenced by his ability to take time off from the local mine to practice lifting stones in preperation of his upcoming NHL career

Miettinen fact #1 - Hameenlinna isnt a real city, its more of a hamlet or a collection of derelict buildings centered around the coal mines.

After the war with Sweden in 1993 in which Millions of Norweigian citizens lost their lives when part of their country slid into the North Atlantic, Miettinen migrated to the US and auditioned for the Dallas Stars. Despite his obvious gift - dashing good looks and a charm with the puck not seen since a bygone era, He was not idmediatly succesfull in the NHL. Many theories have been put foreward as to the cause of his offensive woes, but the most common and popular one is that he has been dragged down by lesser talented competition in the Pacific division. As we all know Finnish players pride themselves on their ability to overcome adversity and win tough, grinding battles over more open and offensive teams. With the level of play currently being exhibited in the pacific by the Phoenix Coyotes (but more noticably the Los Angeles Kings who have failed to win a game against dallas for 1 calander year now and recently traded for known floater Jaroslav Modry) it must sometimes feel like he's playing in the AHL.

Miettinen fact #2 - some Los Angeles Kings fan think that their team will make the playoffs this year without Antti Miettinen on their team - I think if we petition their new GM we could convince him to let us have Jaroslav Modry back for Miettinen and a couple of draft picks - then I could post my videos!

well thats all about to change. I am charging you, the fans of the Dallas Stars, to get on Miettinen's back and demand the 50 goal season that was promised to us when we first brought him up to play in the NHL! I will pledge to posting a comprehensive game recap on the conclusion of each outing this upcoming season, with information for die hard Miettinights! let the MVP season begin!

Furthermore, I will be posting pictures and prescribed worship scheduals later on today, so check back often for updates!

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08-04-2007, 10:26 AM
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Pillard32
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Wow.

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08-04-2007, 10:37 AM
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TrueGrit
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good luck with that

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08-04-2007, 11:36 AM
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OttMorrow
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This is probable cause to search Alistar's house for drugs.

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08-04-2007, 11:55 AM
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Stars99Lobo37
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Originally Posted by Pillard32 View Post
Wow.
I'll 2nd that wow.

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Old
08-04-2007, 12:45 PM
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my true answer to this post can only be political in nature and Ive reached the position Ive reached in life by refraining from comment on posts whose answers are only political in nature therefore I must agree with the posters above and echo

WOW

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08-04-2007, 01:08 PM
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There was a war between Finland and Sweden????? I am glad Holtet survived the sliding of Norway into the ocean!

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08-04-2007, 01:31 PM
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WAR between finland and sweden in 1993?
you meen that war people are shooting on each other from warious guns and dying?
that war between sweden and finland 200 years (two_hundred_years) ago???

drugs are baaaaad my friend...

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Old
08-04-2007, 01:48 PM
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Walzy
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This is probable cause to search Alistar's house for drugs.
but don't tell the cops that he bought it all from Lobo

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Old
08-04-2007, 01:54 PM
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Stars99Lobo37
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but don't tell the cops that he bought it all from Lobo
You promised you wouldn't tell! Dang it. Now I have to move again.

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