Why is hockey so vile and yet so boring? Maybe because it wafts down like a low-pressure system from the most boring country on Earth, America's hat, a place that puts you on trial if you express politically incorrect opinions and makes you wait eight years to get your strep throat treated. We are talking about the land of Molson, Labatt's and other strange brews so vile and boring that, even in high school, when I would get drunk on Asti Spumante or Harvey's Bristol Crème or some other dusty near-poison from the back of the parental liquor cabinet, yes, even in high school, when having a drink with a friend meant gulping in the woods and chuckling feverishly like sprites, I thought Canadian beer tasted like something collected from the floor of the locker room after everyone has taken a shower.
Come on, anyone who gets worked up over that article hasn't actually read it. It is really funny, even though i completely disagree with his ostensible premise.
"I believe, but am not sure, that there is a National Hockey League franchise called the Penguins. There is also one called the Ducks, and the Tinkerbells, and the Wee Willie Winkles (from, of course, Winnipeg). Cute family-friendly names are essential if you are going to get Mom, Dad, Scooter and Trixie to attend the bloodlettings of unibrowed Muscovite thugs."