Some rules Ive found or come up with. I start my beard early around this time because its like the playoffs. I did this when the Phils got hot at the end of the year, guess what. World Series. I started and Eagles one when they lost to Washington, out of good faith, and they almost made the Super Bowl. Im starting my Flyers one now. Im superstitous like that. I dont do any trimming to any hairs myself. Last spring I looked horrendous. Chris Therien thought it was funny though.
AGAIN I DIDNT CREATE THIS FOUND IT AND OTHERS FROM OTHER SITES. Thought itd be a fun read.
THE RULES TO GROWING A PLAYOFF BEARD
1. You don’t have to commit to the beard, just do something else that is a ritual. Maybe you set your alarm clock to the same time everyday. I don’t care what, just do something. (THIS APPLIES TO YOUNGANS WHO CANT GROW FACIAL HAIR AND WOMEN. IF YOU GROW BEARDS YOU BETTER ****ING DO IT!!!!!)
2. Once you commit, you commit. No shaving because it gets hot in June or your parents want you to for graduation or work or anything like that. Once you’re in, you’re in. Don’t mess things up for the Flyers now. I am sure that some ******* shaved his beard allowing any number of tragedies that have befallen the Flyers in the playoffs since 1975, because he had a job interview or something much less important than a Stanley cup the next day. DON’T BE THAT GUY.
3. If you can’t grow a beard and still try, or can only grow something that makes you resemble a Russian porn star, be aware that you may only be bringing the beard karma down. We're striving for quality over quantity here.
4. If you can’t grow a beard, but one of your good friends can, you are required to try and get him to do it. He must be tough enough to put up with a beard even when it gets hot. Jean Sebastian Giguere of the Mighty Ducks hated his beard, but because teammates told him he could grow a “nasty one”, he “did it for the team.” It is your job to relay this spirit to your friends.
5. If you do grow a beard, you have to let your hair grow too. No ifs, ands, or buts about it. That’s the rule.
6. After a loss, and only after a loss, you are allowed to trim the beard. TRIM DOES NOT MEAN SHAVE! If you are confused about this concept, ask your girlfriend. If you are single, you can also ask the girlfriend of a Pens fan after you get done slamming her behind his back. (See Jim Dowd's Porn Stache)
7. After a win, you do nothing to the beard. Nothing. Even if the next playoff series is a week away. DON’T TOUCH IT.
8. The last one was a lie. You should thank it and ask it to continue giving you luck and wisdom through a playoff run. (If you grow a playoff beard, you will become smarter. Or you will appear smarter, one of the two.)
9. If you know someone who grows a beard for another team and that team is eliminated, you must make sure that he A.) shaves the beard and does not just try to hop on another team’s bandwagon and B.) hears comments like “babyface” or “hairless rat” for the remainder of the playoffs. I suggest the latter, because according to a New York paper “hairless rat” was the words a prostitute used to describe a certain part of Sean Avery.
10. If you have a friend or girlfriend who doesn’t like the beard, tell them to **** off. If you lose one girl because of your commitment to a sports team, you will in turn pick up three much hotter girls because of that same commitment.
11. Those with gray in their beards are not allowed to color it...its a mark of pride and a sign of journeys past. (See Ken Danyko)
12. This one is for the ladies. Although they themselves cannot grow beards (and those that can, please don't), you must do whatever is necessary to aid the menfolk in this task. If your man needs food and beer, get him food and beer. Remember, he's eating for two.
13. (This ones hilarious cuz Ive seen this in action) Another one for the ladies. No haircuts, or removal of ANY BODY HAIR. Legs, armpits, anything. Even if you hate sports. Do it for your man. Do it for his/your team. This could be punishable by bannishment from your home until after the playoffs.
By following these simple rules, we can help bring good mojo to our fair city. Good luck with your journey.
Also, maybe we should post pics of our beards after the playoffs. before and afters lol. See who wins the best beard award.
Last edited by TheDrizzle81: 03-25-2009 at 04:46 PM.
I know lol. some of them restate other ones. I copied some from other sites and threw it together., Heres the simple thing. Playoffs start, throw ur razor in the trash.
In years past, my winter coat has just become my playoff beard. By the end of the playoffs, it has been completely out of hand. This year, I just trimmed my winter coat down to a 1/4" about a week ago so hopefully it won't be as ridiculous as before. I may give it one more trim before playoffs start... or I may not.
In years past, my winter coat has just become my playoff beard. By the end of the playoffs, it has been completely out of hand. This year, I just trimmed my winter coat down to a 1/4" about a week ago so hopefully it won't be as ridiculous as before. I may give it one more trim before playoffs start... or I may not.
I'd give yourself a trim with a couple of games left in the regular season, then not touch it at all for the duration of the playoffs.
If I already started growing a beard say...mid-February, do I have to shave it now just to re-grow it for the postseason?
Not necessarily. Just be prepared to have a ridiculously out of control beard by the time you shave it (especially if the Flyers go as deep, or deeper this year than last).
I did this when the Phils got hot at the end of the year, guess what. World Series. I started and Eagles one when they lost to Washington, out of good faith, and they almost made the Super Bowl. Im starting my Flyers one now.
Maybe I'll find something else.
, but I think I'm going to trim/shave some of it today or tomorrow.
