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Cablevision - worst company on the damn planet

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04-22-2010, 11:37 AM
Heat McManus
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Cablevision - worst company on the damn planet

Wednesday Appointment #1: Objective - install cable card into new TiVo Premiere.
What transpired: Cable card was registered to another customer. Technician (and I use that term insanely loosely) removed our amplifier telling us it was not necessary and he added a splitter to help with the weak signal we receive. Told to make appointment for the next day

Thursday Appointment #2: Objective - Install Cable Card into new TiVo Premiere
What transpired: Nothing worked. Cablevision tech had no idea what to do. So, called TiVo. Thank god for Tivo. After 3 minutes of checking the menus we find the problem. Cable card subscription was expired. How does a brand new card expire? I have no idea. Cablevision had no more cable cards for our Tivo. Tech wasn't convinced that this was the problem. Asked me about the set-up, told him most of it was done by my girlfriend (finishing an NYU grad degree in information technology. Knows her ****) or by Cablevision well before I got there. Told to make appointment for next day when they would be getting a new shipment.

Friday Appointment #3: Objective - Install Cable Card into new TiVo Premiere
What transpired: NOTHING. Waited from 11-8 for them. Called at 7:30pm and was told they did not get any new cable cards and would not be coming. Was told they could be there on Tuesday. Great. Awesome. Thanks. Wasted my day off.

Saturday (note, NOT Tuesday) Appointment #4: Objective - Fix Internet that went down Sat Morning
What transpired: Woke up Saturday. No internet. Called Cablevision. They connected me to their trouble shooting department. "Ok, find the power cord. Unplug it....Now wait a minute and plug it back in....Did that work?....No? (NINJA SURPRISE!!!)...Ok, find the cable cord.....Unplug it and wait a minute....Then plug it back in...Did that work?......NO?! (HI-YAAAA!!!!)" Really, McGyver? Think we didn't try that **** already. Maybe I should also try blowing on the underside, wiping it off with a sock, and then smacking it at a 45-degree angle. Was told a tech could come out the next day. No, mother****er a tech will come TODAY (my gf had some pretty important projects for work to get done which required an uninterupted connection to her company so this wasn't a minor issue) This is the fourth straight day your company has ****ed up! Fix it! Was told that we were put on the emergency list, tech would be there between 11am-8pm. Called at 7:45pm. "Is somebody coming?"...."Says here your appointment is for Sunday between 8am and 11am" So, the guy we talked to in the morning lied to us or is just terrible at his job. At this point, I'm not sure which is more likely at Cablevision although there's a 100% chance it's one or the other. Ok, second day off wasted. Thanks.

Sunday Appointment #5: Objective - Fix the Internet
What transpired: I had to leave for work, so my girlfriend stayed and waited for the tech. I saw him on my way out. Same guy from the second appointment. Apparently he was able to fix the cable by switching up a splitter in the backyard. And MAGICALLY! they found a cable card that worked! Imagine that! So, all was well....Aside from the fact that the technician kept asking my girlfriend if her husband was around because he had some questions about the set-up. Yes, the same guy I told explicitly that SHE had set everything up and I did not know much at all about it. So cable and internet, fixed. Customer, offended.

Monday Appointment #Who the **** cares at this point: Objection: Fix Internet
What transpired: Yep, cable went down again. JUDO CHOP! New technician. Looks at the amplifier sitting on the table. Yeah, remember the amplifier that was disconnected during the FIRST ****ING VISIT? "This is probably your problem right here." RE-INSTALLS amplifier, cable fixed. Tech leaves equipment and extra cables around. Brilliant.

For all this, Cablevision graciously offered to refund us the money for the time our cable and internet was down....DUUUUUUUHHHHHHRRR! No ****? Really? We don't have to pay for the time you didn't provide service? What a novel idea. No, we're not paying for the entire month. Every time you had to send a member of your crack(head) team out to us I had to waste my time and in a few cases take time off work. We haven't missed one payment and this is how we get treated. I can't wait till MSG loses another sexual harassment lawsuit or the Knicks sign another no-name for $12m dollars a year to come off the bench for 3 minutes agame and Dolan raises our rates by 15% again.

Had Verizon Fios been available in our area we would have it installed on Saturday.

There are probably some details I'm leaving out, I'll add them if they come back to me, but in summation:

Cablevision is without a doubt THE MOST incompetent, bush-league, horse-**** company I've ever dealt with. Nobody at this company seemed to know anything other than what could be learned from a small pamphlet and an 5-minute flash presentation. And when they did know something there was no continuity or communication between one visit and the next. One tech would show up and ask us about the problem and what had been done by earlier technicians. Then they'd say something like, "I don't think he would have done that."....GOTCHA!! Actually, the tech dropped his pants and **** on my floor. That's much more likely than installing a splitter in the backyard.In addition to receiving inefficient service we were lied to and offended.

Thanks Cablevision. From the bottom of my bowels, thank you.

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04-22-2010, 11:47 AM
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You wouldn't get any better treatment from verizon trust me i work with them daily.

What most people don't understand or ignore when they sign up for these services is that they are what is referred to as "Best Effort Services". Which means you have no service level agreement stating uptime, response times etc.

They didn't have to refund you any $$ at all. They did so for PR reasons but contractually they are not obligated to do so. Your speed, uptime etc is not guaranteed in the slightest.

I would suggest sticking with the least expensive high speed offering and tell your GF to get herself a 3g wireless card if her job is important enough to require constant contact with the office.

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04-22-2010, 12:04 PM
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HA, you think you'll get better treatment from verizon?

Don't kid yourself, they're run by the same crackheads.

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04-22-2010, 12:16 PM
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Sucks man.


It's just pain.
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