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Around the NHL part 4: season's starting, so let's mock everyone else

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Old
03-29-2012, 07:37 PM
  #76
PaulProteus
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jussi Trollinen View Post
On a lighter note, Crosby apparently got hit in the nose with a slapshot. Pretty hilarious tbh
Yikes. I just went over to NHL.com and watched it. Sid the Hard Luck Kid.

Anson Carter is on NHL Network now, and he's having a bad hair day.

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03-29-2012, 07:39 PM
  #77
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Yikes. I just went over to NHL.com and watched it. Sid the Hard Luck Kid.

Anson Carter is on NHL Network now, and he's having a bad hair day.
Someone asked him what he'd do for a Klondike bar, and he answered "Eat Vulcanized Rubber"

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03-29-2012, 07:43 PM
  #78
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Originally Posted by Jussi Trollinen View Post
Someone asked him what he'd do for a Klondike bar, and he answered "Eat Vulcanized Rubber"
I can hardly for the life of me remember a Crosby highlight that didn't involve him getting helped off the ice.

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03-29-2012, 07:45 PM
  #79
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I can hardly for the life of me remember a Crosby highlight that didn't involve him getting helped off the ice.
Yeah he doesn't really do much except whine and get hurt. (no sarcasm emoticon on iPhone)

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Old
03-29-2012, 07:53 PM
  #80
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Yeah he doesn't really do much except whine and get hurt. (no sarcasm emoticon on iPhone)
Not mocking him, or making light of his skills. It just seems like the guy has more than his fair share of rough road to travel.

Edit: I have plenty of sarcasm to go around, but joking about guys getting hurt isn't my style. I'll leave that for the Pittsburgh fans who still like to talk about Orpik and Cole, or the ones who cheered when Skinner got blasted by Orpik earlier this year.


Last edited by PaulProteus: 03-29-2012 at 07:59 PM.
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Old
03-29-2012, 08:04 PM
  #81
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+



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Karma took it's time, but it finally got around to it, it would seem

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03-29-2012, 08:06 PM
  #82
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I don't think I can overstate how much I dislike the Bruins, their television announcers and the majority of their fans. Go Capitals!

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03-29-2012, 08:18 PM
  #83
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Toronto, you don't need to lose by 6+ goals in order to tank. Just score less than the opposing team. This is ridiculous.

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Old
03-29-2012, 08:20 PM
  #84
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I don't think I can overstate how much I dislike the Bruins, their television announcers and the majority of their fans. Go Capitals!
I feel exactly the same way. Usually I can't sit here and even watch them, I dislike them so much.

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03-29-2012, 08:25 PM
  #85
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Flyers up 7-1.

Scott Hartnell with no goals.

Claude Giroux with no assists.

Proof that Eric Staal is having the greatest season in history.

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03-29-2012, 09:11 PM
  #86
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Originally Posted by PublicEnemy View Post
Toronto, you don't need to lose by 6+ goals in order to tank. Just score less than the opposing team. This is ridiculous.
It's Jussi Rynnas, what do you expect?

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Old
03-29-2012, 09:16 PM
  #87
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It's Jussi Rynnas, what do you expect?
Massive overhyping

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Old
03-30-2012, 01:13 PM
  #88
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Watching the Blues-Blackhawks game convinced me that there needs to be a playoff series between these two.


Round 1:
Blues beat 8th seed
Canucks beat 7th seed
Nashville/Detroit battle royale with cheese, can't decide here
Blackhawks beat 3 seed (assuming Nashville/Detroit stay at 4 and 5)

Round 2:
Blackhawks beat Blues
Canucks beat Nashville/Detroit

Round 3:
Blackhawks beat Canucks(Trololololollol)


I highly doubt Chicago does that, but it would be absolutely epic to do so. Those matchups in rounds 2 and 3 sound incredibly legit.

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Old
03-30-2012, 06:52 PM
  #89
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Originally Posted by PublicEnemy View Post
Watching the Blues-Blackhawks game convinced me that there needs to be a playoff series between these two.


Round 1:
Blues beat 8th seed
Canucks beat 7th seed
Nashville/Detroit battle royale with cheese, can't decide here
Blackhawks beat 3 seed (assuming Nashville/Detroit stay at 4 and 5)

Round 2:
Blackhawks beat Blues
Canucks beat Nashville/Detroit

Round 3:
Blackhawks beat Canucks(Trololololollol)


I highly doubt Chicago does that, but it would be absolutely epic to do so. Those matchups in rounds 2 and 3 sound incredibly legit.
Even better would be Predators//Panthers. Imagine the controversy and mass hysteria if a team from Tennessee played a team from Florida for a Championship born out of cold, frost-bitten wastelands

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Old
03-30-2012, 08:33 PM
  #90
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Nevermind

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Old
03-30-2012, 08:53 PM
  #91
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Four points for Crosby tonight.

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Old
03-30-2012, 08:55 PM
  #92
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Four points for Crosby tonight.
Total bust.

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Old
03-30-2012, 08:55 PM
  #93
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Four points for Crosby tonight.
I hope he's back for good now, but I worry come playoff time. Intensity gets ramped up....

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03-30-2012, 09:05 PM
  #94
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He came back in time for fantasy hockey playoffs, and as we all know, that is all that truly matters.

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Old
03-30-2012, 09:08 PM
  #95
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He came back in time for fantasy hockey playoffs, and as we all know, that is all that truly matters.
Now if only Brook Lopez would do the same

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Old
03-30-2012, 09:09 PM
  #96
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What if we were to somehow land Parise...and sign Parenteau (not sure if he'd work here, it's a hypothetical), get rid of EhStew and Nodl, pressbox Joslin, re-sign our RFAs....and have this (pending on if Allen re-signs):


Parise-Staal-Parenteau
Skinner-Jokinen-Ruutu
Bowman-Sutter-Tlusty
LaRose-Brent-Dwyer


Gleason-Allen/whomever
Pitkanen-McBain
Harrison-Faulk

Ward
Boucher


I like it. If Parenteau doesn't work out as well as I hope offensively, switch him with Fats.

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Old
03-30-2012, 09:25 PM
  #97
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Personally, i'd like to see what Tlusty can do with a full year in the top 6. Sign Parise and spend every leftover available cent in upgrading Allen. I don't think too much is lost.

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Old
03-30-2012, 09:29 PM
  #98
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Personally, i'd like to see what Tlusty can do with a full year in the top 6. Sign Parise and spend every leftover available cent in upgrading Allen. I don't think too much is lost.
We keep discussing how much Sutter deserves a greater offensive role, and how well Bowman has played on his line. Maybe we could move to a Top-9 system, rather than a Top-6/Bottom-6 that we usually have. That's what I am somewhat aiming at with my proposed lineup above. Feel free to mix/match those lines as you wish.

Parenteau intrigues me....however, I'm not sure if he would be as effective working with Sutter as he would with Staal. That's why I ended up moving Tlusty down to the third line, a spot that he has shown a knack for as well.

All in all, it's just a hypothetical that just popped into my head. I never really thought about signing Parenteau until this afternoon when his name popped up in Michael Smith's Q&A session.

EDIT: I'll assume the following salaries, though they may not be close to what the players get: Parise gets the $8,250,000 that Staal earns for my scenario, $3,000,000 for Parenteau, $3,000,000 for Allen, $1,500,000 for McBain, $1,500,000 for Tlusty, $800,000 for Bowman. That puts the team at a cap space of just over $5.5 million, assuming we can make Nodl and Stewart disappear into thin air.

FORWARDS
Zach Parise ($8.250m) / Eric Staal ($8.250m) / P-A Parenteau ($3.000m)
Jeff Skinner ($1.400m) / Jussi Jokinen ($3.000m) / Tuomo Ruutu ($4.750m)
Drayson Bowman ($0.800m) / Brandon Sutter ($2.067m) / Jiri Tlusty ($1.500m)
Chad Larose ($1.700m) / Tim Brent ($0.750m) / Pat Dwyer ($0.625m)
DEFENSEMEN
Joni Pitkanen ($4.500m) / Justin Faulk ($0.900m)
Tim Gleason ($4.000m) / Bryan Allen ($3.000m)
Jay Harrison ($0.700m) / Jamie McBain ($1.500m)
Derek Joslin ($0.700m) /
GOALTENDERS
Cam Ward ($6.300m)
Brian Boucher ($0.950m)
------
CAPGEEK.COM TOTALS (follow @capgeek on Twitter)
(these totals are compiled without the bonus cushion)
SALARY CAP: $64,300,000; CAP PAYROLL: $58,641,667; BONUSES: $560,000
CAP SPACE (21-man roster): $5,658,333


Last edited by Head Goose: 03-30-2012 at 09:37 PM.
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Old
03-30-2012, 09:35 PM
  #99
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Even better would be Predators//Panthers. Imagine the controversy and mass hysteria if a team from Tennessee played a team from Florida for a Championship born out of cold, frost-bitten wastelands
Legitimately, I would love to see that. It would drive people CRAZY.

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Old
03-31-2012, 06:46 AM
  #100
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Originally Posted by PublicEnemy View Post
:


Parise-Staal-Parenteau
Skinner-Jokinen-Ruutu
Bowman-Sutter-Tlusty
LaRose-Brent-Dwyer


Gleason-Allen/whomever
Pitkanen-McBain
Harrison-Faulk

Ward
Boucher
I like that lineup. A legit 1st 2nd and 4th lines, with a 3rd line that is really a 2nd - 3rd tweener line.

Of course, the two missing ingredients are the same missing ingredients we've had for the last three or four years - legit 1st line wingers.

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