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The Cult of Joe Vitale (Orr vs. Vitale - better goal?)

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Old
02-05-2013, 09:20 AM
  #101
KIRK
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Originally Posted by kratzbuerste View Post
So I was re-watching last seasonīs In The Room just now, because of reasons, and at one point during the first episode Bylsma says: "It doesnīt matter if it is with Crosby, Staal or Vitale, we play the same game." (paraphrased)
How does Staal even get named in the same breath as the other two?
You know Bylsma tries not to play favorites.

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02-06-2013, 10:09 AM
  #102
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Originally Posted by LostLiquorLicense View Post
The Ten Commandments of Joe Vitale
I have no words at this moment that aduquately express my pride in this board's commitment to self-education and awareness. Go forth and do good works in the name of Joe. Steal not thy brother's Qdoba, nor thy sister's cinnamon danish, for we are all in the Family of Joe. To steal from thy neighbor is to steal from Joe. Unless your neighbor is a Flyers fan.

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02-06-2013, 10:21 AM
  #103
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Originally Posted by Chancellor Vitale View Post
I have no words at this moment that aduquately express my pride in this board's commitment to self-education and awareness. Go forth and do good works in the name of Joe. Steal not thy brother's Qdoba, nor thy sister's cinnamon danish, for we are all in the Family of Joe. To steal from thy neighbor is to steal from Joe. Unless your neighbor is a Flyers fan.
Speaking of: how are you gonna cope when Vitale signs a 3-year 7.25mm contract with the Flyers? :p

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02-06-2013, 10:29 AM
  #104
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kratzbuerste View Post
So I was re-watching last seasonīs In The Room just now, because of reasons, and at one point during the first episode Bylsma says: "It doesnīt matter if it is with Crosby, Staal or Vitale, we play the same game." (paraphrased)
How does Staal even get named in the same breath as the other two?
It was the will of the Joe speaking through Bylsma. Staal had just shown great reverence for the 10th commandment, and Joe felt that he needed to be rewarded publicly. That is the true reason why Jordan went to Carolina. He knew that he was not derving of the many blessings that the Joe was bestowing upon him.

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02-06-2013, 10:31 AM
  #105
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Originally Posted by IcedCapp View Post
Speaking of: how are you gonna cope when Vitale signs a 3-year 7.25mm contract with the Flyers? :p
Get behind us thou most foreign and foul Flyers scum! The only reason Talbot left was because of the will of Joe.

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02-06-2013, 09:06 PM
  #106
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Can you believe there is a TRADE proposal involving the almighty Vitale in the proposal section? AS IF

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02-06-2013, 09:08 PM
  #107
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Originally Posted by Tasty Biscuits View Post
Can you believe there is a TRADE proposal involving the almighty Vitale in the proposal section? AS IF
i set him right, i think. maybe they'll make me a high priest of Joe for my efforts. one can only hope.

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02-06-2013, 09:09 PM
  #108
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Originally Posted by Tasty Biscuits View Post
Can you believe there is a TRADE proposal involving the almighty Vitale in the proposal section? AS IF
The sinner has repented. All is well. Praise be to Vitale.

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02-06-2013, 10:03 PM
  #109
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Originally Posted by Lost in Crafton View Post
i set him right, i think. maybe they'll make me a high priest of Joe for my efforts. one can only hope.
It turned into a nice pile on. Everyone should be properly educated now.

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02-06-2013, 11:41 PM
  #110
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Chancellor Vitale View Post
I have no words at this moment that aduquately express my pride in this board's commitment to self-education and awareness. Go forth and do good works in the name of Joe. Steal not thy brother's Qdoba, nor thy sister's cinnamon danish, for we are all in the Family of Joe. To steal from thy neighbor is to steal from Joe. Unless your neighbor is a Flyers fan.
I am but a conduit. A great and thunderous goal horn erupted from the skies, and I scaled the hilltop overlooking a deck hockey rink. The Vitale's words were delivered to me etched upon two goalie masks, and I brought them forth to bestow their teachings upon the world.

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02-06-2013, 11:53 PM
  #111
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02-07-2013, 03:21 PM
  #112
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The person who made that video is already in custody. Pending confirmation of Director Brennan, he will be released under house arrest around 6pm... just in time for a 6:15 drone strike. Freedom is not for blasphemers.

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02-08-2013, 06:19 AM
  #113
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Originally Posted by Chancellor Vitale View Post
The person who made that video is already in custody. Pending confirmation of Director Brennan, he will be released under house arrest around 6pm... just in time for a 6:15 drone strike. Freedom is not for blasphemers.
The will of Joe be done.

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02-10-2013, 06:36 PM
  #114
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Fire Bylsma.

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02-10-2013, 06:40 PM
  #115
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Joe came to San Francisco and built us a great hotel.


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02-10-2013, 06:47 PM
  #116
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...and on the 7th day, he rested.

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02-11-2013, 01:14 PM
  #117
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This is what happens when you scratch Vitale. No reason for him to sit when you've got chumps like Kennedy dogging it.

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02-11-2013, 02:40 PM
  #118
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Does anyone else think he sounds like Badger from Breaking Bad? The first words spoken from In the Room solidify it for me.

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02-11-2013, 04:36 PM
  #119
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Quote:
Originally Posted by IcedCapp View Post
Speaking of: how are you gonna cope when Vitale signs a 3-year 7.25mm contract with the Flyers? :p
First of all, Joe does not sign with the Flyers. He has more character in his little toe than Max Talbot has in his entire being. Second, Joe does not use 7.25mm. He prefers to use the 10mm Sig 220.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Crafton View Post
Joe came to San Francisco and built us a great hotel.

Pff. Probably sketched and designed that during one of his workout off-days a couple summers ago.

Perhaps you are familiar with his other design:


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02-11-2013, 04:39 PM
  #120
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BTW you guys probably heard that the Pope announced his resignation today... it is rumored that Vatican City has contacted Shero about a possible buy-out, so Joe can become Pope. Shero paused then replied: "Joe doesn't Pope; he drinks from the Cup not the chalice", and hung up.

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02-11-2013, 07:45 PM
  #121
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Chancellor Vitale View Post
BTW you guys probably heard that the Pope announced his resignation today... it is rumored that Vatican City has contacted Shero about a possible buy-out, so Joe can become Pope. Shero paused then replied: "Joe doesn't Pope; he drinks from the Cup not the chalice", and hung up.
How long did you work on that joke before you got it exactly how you wanted it?

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02-11-2013, 08:32 PM
  #122
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Originally Posted by Sidney the Kidney View Post
How long did you work on that joke before you got it exactly how you wanted it?
The joke was delivered by Joe himself to his loyal subject Chancellor in a holy vision. We can not attribute such brilliant humour to any earthly being.

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Old
02-11-2013, 09:04 PM
  #123
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It is true. A brief moment of pure inspiration hit me and I posted, as if a higher power was speaking through me. Zero prep time on that one.

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02-11-2013, 09:29 PM
  #124
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You're all going to **** bricks when I tell you that I no longer believe in Craig Adams, a man of little faith who believes in nothing. Also, he's a nihilist.



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Old
02-11-2013, 10:29 PM
  #125
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I knew you'd come around, Burgundy... don't feel shame. Rejoice in your new-found knowledge.

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