OT: Razorisms

[BigG44]

We need a thread to pay homage to the brilliance that is Daryl "Razor" Reaugh.

Razorism #1: "Stickhandle through raindrops"

Referring to Mike Ribeiro's ability with the puck.

Razorism #2: "Anus Vacuum"

Referring to Krys Barch's former career. Barch worked the anus vacuum at a slaughterhouse. A classic story that Razor told during an extended Barch fight.



You hear just the beginning of the story in the final seconds.

[Alistar]

"He's a knee seaking missle, he's a scud"

-Boston announcer


but now on topic one of my favorite moments from this year...

"HE GOT HIM WITH THE SNEAKY LEFT!"

-referring to Krys Barch beating down Jared Boll

[BigG44]

Razorism #4: “Securitize the pill”

Dallas with a bunch of stupid turnovers against the New Jersey Devils.

[DaStars99]

That was larceny!

[BigG44]

Originally Posted by DaStars99

That was larceny!

I wasn't sure if that was him or a common phrase in hockey.

[theheadmata]

"Like nailing Jello to a tree." On Mikey Ribs' ability to maneuver around checks.

[piqued]

"high priest of head fakes"

"sultan of sagacity"

"irritainment"

[Caseman]

"Turcolicious"

Funny... I haven't heard him say that this season

[Sony Eriksson*]

"5 knuckle meat soothers"

[________]

I think I have this one wrong, but close enough.
"The first mouse never gets the cheese, it's always the second mouse." Razor hasn't used it in a couple years.

Then "Crease Weasel".

[piqued]

"The wheel's still spinning, but the hamster's dead."

[starsfan24]

"Stortini looks like a muppet right now"

Edmonton Fight

[Gravypan]

Originally Posted by starsfan24

"Stortini looks like a muppet right now"

Edmonton Fight

Yep.

[DaStars99]

he makes a mastodoic save

[Fly Like a C5]

"...on your toes like a midget at a urinal"

"these refs are all want to be vice cops, they're all against hooking"

[JONESINforSETH]

Originally Posted by secretsquirrel

"...on your toes like a midget at a urinal"

"these refs are all want to be vice cops, they're all against hooking"

Has to be my favorite one in a while even dumbfounded Ralph for a few seconds.

[BigG44]

Originally Posted by secretsquirrel

"...on your toes like a midget at a urinal"

"these refs are all want to be vice cops, they're all against hooking"

I forgot that one. That one cracked me up.

[haf]

After Steve Ott scored a goal from the left circle,

"Steve Ott skates in, dusts it off, steps up the ladies tees, pulls its pants down and just spanks it home."

[Neil76]

One I read on another forum a while back still makes me laugh

"he looks as confused as a breast feeding baby in a strip club"

Genius

[Caseman]

Ribeiro's shootout goal made #5 in the Top 10 Midseason plays, along with Razor doing his thing

"Awohh, CHEEKY!"

[JONESINforSETH]

Razor finally addresses the 'stache, unfortunately makes no mention of a bet.

http://blog.dallasstars.com/archives...he_stache.html

In order to have this stache reach its full, bushy potential I've been starting each day by smearing a rogaine/propecia/sasquatch-urine concoction on it

[Stars99Lobo37]

That thing is hideous.

Shave it now.

[piqued]

Originally Posted by Caseman

Ribeiro's shootout goal made #5 in the Top 10 Midseason plays, along with Razor doing his thing

"Awohh, CHEEKY!"

Nice find, I've only seen replays of that with the Kings' announcers who didn't realize what was going on immediately.
edit: it's in HD also @ youtube

[DaStars99]

Originally Posted by Stars99Lobo37

That thing is hideous.

Shave it now.

just so it can be in this thread here it is

[JONESINforSETH]

Latest installment of Razor and I thought everyone should take a gander. Just like HF'ers he is analyzing the mid-season point and what the team needs to do to make the playoffs.

My personal favorite Ott

Steve Ott – two hands (eventually) and “edge” therapy that keeps him from going from ice-pest to ice-crime a-hole.

http://blog.dallasstars.com/