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Old
05-29-2012, 07:36 PM
  #26
leesmith
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1. Nash does NOT get traded before the start of the season, causing the rumor mill to grind all summer and autumn.
2. Prospal gets the C. Johnson, Umberger and Dorsett are the alternates once Nash is gone.
3. Steve Mason is bought out. He lands a job with a European team before the end of the year.
4. CBJ fail to score more than 2 goals in at least HALF of their games.
5. CBJ finish 12th in the Western Conference but are never seriously in playoff contention. All front office staff and coaches retain their jobs for another year.


Last edited by leesmith: 05-29-2012 at 07:42 PM.
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Old
05-29-2012, 07:41 PM
  #27
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nanabijou View Post
4. At year's end, the most common 'third line' used by Richards throughout the year is Umberger-Letestu-Dorsett. Viqsi's head explodes if anyone refers to this line as anything besides the 'other second line'.
Love it!

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05-29-2012, 07:50 PM
  #28
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1. Yakupov falls to us at 2nd, despite Edmonton fans telling us we'd need to give up Nash + Johansen + J. Johnson + 2012 1st + 2013 1st to get him. The schadenfreude around here goes off the charts.
2. We go into next season with a Vokoun-Mason tandem.
3. Johansen is traded at some point next season.
4. Instead of the typical hot start (last season excluded), terrible December/January, medicore February/early March, and hot late March/April, the team sort of hangs around the 11th/13th spot in the west all season.
5. Even the tr00 fans can't complain about the country club atmosphere as we become likable underdogs that play a gritty game.

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05-29-2012, 08:03 PM
  #29
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1. CBJ finish within 10 points of both DET and CHI. Take this as you will.
2. JMFJ wears the C
3. Mason is no longer in the organization by opening day.
4. The starting goalie will win 30 games with no less than 5 shut outs and will be an all star.
5. Nash will be booed at the all star game after dispatch paints poor picture of him post-trade.

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Old
05-29-2012, 08:10 PM
  #30
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1. After an "investigation" into questionable business behavior/practices Priest is let go and Nationwide steps into control of the Blue Jackets. A respectable hockey mind is brought in as president. 65% of the team is then sold to a surprise outside interest.
2. A partial season lock out shortens the season to 64 games. The resulting contract is less favorable to small market teams. Nash's contract is bought out at this time with no return except saving $$s.
3. Six Blue Jackets players are heavily fined by the league for shenanigans during a charity golf outing.
4. The Jackets are fifth in the West and reach the second round. It is well understood that they achieved this seeming miracle by "playing a whole 60 minutes", and "letting the puck do the work."
5. The All Star Game is a wonderful showcase of Columbus enjoyed by all hockey fans everywhere.



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Old
05-29-2012, 08:16 PM
  #31
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1) Half the preseason games are cancelled due to brief lockout. CBJ do not refund $ to season ticket holders. Instead, credit $ to 2013-2014 season tickets.
2) Nash traded after Draft day. Scores 40 goals in each of next 3 seasons.
3) Mason waived to AHL. Does not clear waivers. Starts 20 NHL games with at least 13 wins, including a shutout of the CBJ at Nationwide - prompting numerous postings on the "Is this your lowest point as a CBJ fan" thread.
4) Dispatch resumes writing the "Could have had Dineen instead" articles the week before the All-Star Game.
5) CBJ make late season surge to finish 11th in the West. Most national commentators feel that CBJ "overachieved."

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05-29-2012, 08:36 PM
  #32
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1. Mason is not the goaltender for any CBJ game. Please God.
2. Joey gets involved in off-ice mischief and spends some time in the pressbox as a result.
3. Dorse maintains the improvement we saw last season, at least.
4. The arena chefs name a sandwich after me and my 5 friends who attend every game.
5. We make the playoffs. I just gotta believe. It's the only way I know.

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05-29-2012, 08:53 PM
  #33
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1 Nash gets traded for ... wait for it ... Jeff Carter
2 CBJ drafts Murray
3 CBJ trades Murray for MPS + Omark
4 Mason is left quietly sleeping in his hotel room in Western Canada at some point in October
5 CBJ changes all email addresses and phone numbers

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Old
05-29-2012, 08:55 PM
  #34
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1. Johnson is C and on the All Star team representing Columbus.
2. Galy is the 2nd pick of the draft causing a stir about being another Russian while Howson reiterates he's American.
3. Our goaltending tandem going into the season is Dekanich and Josh Harding with Harding being our number 1.
4. Nash traded to NYR making getting the pieces he wanted at the trade deadline making the mains at HF implode.
5. Johan comes into camp and shows why he is the top prospect on this team.



6. We make the playoffs as the 7th seed and finally win a playoff game.

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Old
05-29-2012, 09:16 PM
  #35
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1. Steven Mason legally changes his last name to "Stonecutter."
2. Derek Dorsett accepts a gig as the host of "Canada's Got Talent," thus violating the "morals" clause of his new contract.
3. New captain Jack Johnson picks Christina Perri's "1,000 Years" as the song the team takes the ice to.
4. Team hires Keith Emerson as new arena organist.
5. A local celebrity is brought in to fire the cannon for each home game. Ben Curtis declines offer for opening night because of the team's refusal to allow him to use Titleist cannon balls, so the team books Anietra Hamper. Jokes about footballs abound.

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Last edited by Double-Shift Lassť: 05-29-2012 at 09:22 PM.
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Old
05-29-2012, 09:34 PM
  #36
leesmith
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Hmmm. The celebrity/guest cannon firer is an intriguing idea.

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Old
05-29-2012, 09:45 PM
  #37
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Here is my FANTASY 5 predictions. Things that won't happen, but would be pretty cool if they did.

1. Controlling interest in the team is sold to none other than Mark Cuban vows to win the Cup by 2015, but not buy rings for the players afterwards.
2. On day one, Cuban begins a front office purge - replacing Priest with John Davidson and replacing Howson with some guy from the Shark Tank.
3. Billy and George are reunited on radio. Bob McElligot is paired with Kevin Weekes on TV.
4. Season ticket holders are treated to their wi-fi network and their own concession stands in the upper and lower bowls. Half price food and, during weeknight games, a happy hour with half price beers.
5. Not only is Boomer brought back, he is given two mini-sidekicks: The Cannonballs.

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Old
05-29-2012, 09:49 PM
  #38
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Quote:
Originally Posted by leesmith View Post
Hmmm. The celebrity/guest cannon firer is an intriguing idea.
I agree.

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Old
05-29-2012, 10:31 PM
  #39
Robert
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My family and friends over the weekend did discuss Rick Nash in detail but most of the discussion was about the amazing 8th seed Kings and 40 year old Broduer.. That said:

1. Jack Johnson wears the C-YES
2. Jack Johnson earns a Norris nomination-NO
3. Mason is not our #1 goalie opening night-YES
4. Galchenyuk is drafted by the CBJ with the #2 pick-NO
5. The CBJ finish 9th or 10th in the West, barely missing the playoffs (3 or few points out)-NO

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Old
05-30-2012, 12:18 AM
  #40
Viqsi
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nanabijou View Post
4. At year's end, the most common 'third line' used by Richards throughout the year is Umberger-Letestu-Dorsett. Viqsi's head explodes if anyone refers to this line as anything besides the 'other second line'.



Also, there's a lot more cynicism here than I would have ever imagined.

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Old
05-30-2012, 01:01 AM
  #41
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Double-Shift Lassť View Post
1. Steven Mason legally changes his last name to "Stonecutter."
2. Derek Dorsett accepts a gig as the host of "Canada's Got Talent," thus violating the "morals" clause of his new contract.
3. New captain Jack Johnson picks Christina Perri's "1,000 Years" as the song the team takes the ice to.
4. Team hires Keith Emerson as new arena organist.
5. A local celebrity is brought in to fire the cannon for each home game. Ben Curtis declines offer for opening night because of the team's refusal to allow him to use Titleist cannon balls, so the team books Anietra Hamper. Jokes about footballs abound.
Great list, love the emerson part

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Old
05-30-2012, 01:02 AM
  #42
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5) Mark Dekanich is re-signed to a one-year deal, but it's a two-way contract. Cedrick Desjardins is signed to a two-year, one-way deal.
I hope you're right on this one.

My five predictions:

1) Jack Johnson never draws another sober breath after Kings win Stanley Cup. Kidding. I hope. Real prediction #1) Johnson leads Columbus improvement in defense. Jackets go from #28 to #15 in goals allowed. Assumes no Mason. Of course.

2) Mason bought out in off season.

3) Nash traded by draft day.

4) Atkinson scores 20.

5) #2 overall pick used for forward.

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Old
05-30-2012, 01:18 AM
  #43
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mayor Bee View Post
5) Mark Dekanich is re-signed to a one-year deal, but it's a two-way contract. Cedrick Desjardins is signed to a two-year, one-way deal.
I work with a guy who is neighbours with his parents. The guy I work with said he was talking to his Dad and it sounds like Dekanich might get a training camp invite. Perhaps to prove that he is still capable from the injury and that he is healthy. I asked the guy, what happens if Dekanich gets a offer from another team and he said he didn't know about that situation. So we somehow get rid of Mason, sign/trade a starter. Sign Dekanich as a backup and offer Sanford a 2 way contract?

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05-30-2012, 05:52 AM
  #44
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You work with a lot of people-

If we sign Dek & Sanford, I'd do it the other way around-dek the 2 way and sanford the one.

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Old
05-30-2012, 05:54 AM
  #45
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Quote:
Originally Posted by leesmith View Post
Hmmm. The celebrity/guest cannon firer is an intriguing idea.
I have to admit I thought the same.



Of course, it started out as a joke. (Do you think I should have put one of these in my earlier post?)

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Old
05-30-2012, 07:44 AM
  #46
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Quote:
Originally Posted by leesmith View Post
Hmmm. The celebrity/guest cannon firer is an intriguing idea.
Would be more interesting if they brought back Boomer to fire it AT celebrities.

1. Nash gone July 1.
2. Luongo here July 2.
3. Priest "steps down"
4. In a bid for higher ratings, FSO hires cleavaged women to sit behind team benches.
5. The C is rotated all season between RJ, Vinny, Jack and Wiz.

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Old
05-30-2012, 08:39 AM
  #47
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I'll play.

1. Priest resigns from his position to pursue other opportunities.
2. Nash is traded for what, initially looks like an uninspiring move, but history proves that is inaccurate. Nash scores 40+ goals, however we end up scoring more goals as a team without him.
3. Atkinson scores 60+ points and becomes one of the top two forwards on this team.
4. Johansen doesn't stay with the team the whole year and makes a few trips back and forth to the AHL.
5. We end up with 93 points. No one can quite put a finger on why.

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05-30-2012, 08:39 AM
  #48
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1) Yak falls to us at #2, but we pick someone else.
2) Mason is the starter opening night.
3) Dekanich signs a two way contract, but sprains his wrist signing it, and missing the season.
4) After playing .500 for our first 20 games, Howson's contract is extended.
5) Nash is traded to our opening night opponent.

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Old
05-30-2012, 09:12 AM
  #49
Viqsi
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Quote:
Originally Posted by blahblah View Post
5. We end up with 93 points. No one can quite put a finger on why.
5b) ...but that doesn't stop myself and Mayor Bee from crowing about it.

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Old
05-30-2012, 10:23 AM
  #50
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1: This team finishes somewhere between 14th and 11th in the conference.

2: We still have no clearer picture on what Johansen will become.

3: An Assistant coach is hired that will eventually become the next interim coach sometime in the early to middle part of the 2013-14 season.

4: Cam Atkinson suffers from 'Matt Calvert' syndrome.

5: In lieu of another form-letter to STH'ers, we, again, are treated to a jumbo-tron mea culpa by McConnell, again promising a review and changes to be competitive.

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