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IIHF Power Rankings

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Old
05-03-2013, 03:10 AM
  #1
slovakiasnextone
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IIHF Power Rankings

The first edition of this years' IIHF Power Rankings:

Quote:
POWER RANKINGS (AS OF 2 MAY)
1.

RUSSIA
Undefeated since 2011 – any other questions?
2.

CANADA
To Europeans, our Ruff style will be highly offensive
3.

SWEDEN
Unlike Justin Bieber’s tour bus, we won’t stink in Stockholm
4.

CZECH REPUBLIC
What, no love for the defending bronze medal champions?
5.

SLOVAKIA
Satan and Stumpel aren’t old, they’re experienced
6.

UNITED STATES
Time to prove everyone wrong, Joe
7.

FINLAND
Seriously, dude, we play for Finland! Now let us in!
8.

NORWAY
If Thor Heyerdahl rafted across the Pacific, we can make the top eight
9.

SWITZERLAND
Whatever, Norway
10.

GERMANY
Our “Hoff” skates better than the one on Baywatch
11.

DENMARK
It's our 10-year anniversary...but it still feels like the first time
12.

LATVIA
Sochi, baby! Bang that drum!
13.

FRANCE
Philippe Bozon, thank you for procreating
14.

BELARUS
Can't get relegated. Best. Format. Ever.
15.

AUSTRIA
Sochi, baby! Eat that Sacher Torte!
16.

SLOVENIA
Sochi, baby! Um...this is silly, we have a tournament to play here

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Old
05-03-2013, 04:34 AM
  #2
Ola
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Jesus Canadian press will go beserk over those comments.

I wonder if this is the nail in the coffin that makes em pull out of the tourney all together.

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Old
05-03-2013, 05:22 AM
  #3
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Love finland's

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Old
05-03-2013, 05:35 AM
  #4
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Originally Posted by Ola View Post
Jesus Canadian press will go beserk over those comments.

I wonder if this is the nail in the coffin that makes em pull out of the tourney all together.
I don't get it. Care to explain?

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Old
05-03-2013, 05:41 AM
  #5
TheNeutrality
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The highlight of every WHC

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Old
05-03-2013, 05:50 AM
  #6
Finnpin
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Denmark is ranked too low.

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Old
05-03-2013, 07:00 AM
  #7
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lol Canada has far too much faith in Ruff

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Old
05-03-2013, 07:20 AM
  #8
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France and Finland pure gold

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Old
05-03-2013, 07:23 AM
  #9
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Haaahha we have great one this time.

Can imagine guys knocking the arenas door. "Hey, seriousely, this is not fun anymore.. we ARE the team finland, open the god damn gates"

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Old
05-03-2013, 10:32 AM
  #10
TheNeutrality
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Like Wall View Post
I don't get it. Care to explain?
Because hockey is

SERIOUS.

BUSINESS.

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Old
05-03-2013, 11:25 AM
  #11
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Like usual, the best part of the tournament

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Old
05-03-2013, 11:28 AM
  #12
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I always enjoy reading these.

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Old
05-03-2013, 01:03 PM
  #13
Finnpin
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Quote:
Originally Posted by QnebO View Post
Haaahha we have great one this time.

Can imagine guys knocking the arenas door. "Hey, seriousely, this is not fun anymore.. we ARE the team finland, open the god damn gates"

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Old
05-05-2013, 04:41 PM
  #14
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POWER RANKINGS (AS OF 5 MAY)
1.

RUSSIA
Ilya will kill ya
2.

SWITZERLAND
The dish is Puck à la Torino, cooked by chef Martin Gerber
3.

FINLAND
Jari, you played with Gretzky – was he as good as Kontiola?
4.

UNITED STATES
Is America ready for an openly gold medal-contending team?
5.

NORWAY
Who doesn’t love a little Viking-on-Viking action? Woo hoo!
6.

SWEDEN
It’s about consistency, and we score two goals every game
7.

CANADA
OMG...we got beaten by Tom Cruise’s daughter!
8.

CZECH REPUBLIC
Could a non-NHLer please get a point?
9.

SLOVAKIA
Antti, we hate you! Retweeted by Vancouver Canucks
10.

FRANCE
After we beat Austria, Napoleon friended us on Facebook
11.

BELARUS
Who here can score from center ice?
12.

GERMANY
Herr Kovalchuk, please retire before 2025
13.

DENMARK
Norway, we do not love your Viking-on-Viking action
14.

LATVIA
Can't stop 20 Americans with one Rochester American
15.

AUSTRIA
Clone Vanek before it's too late
16.

SLOVENIA
Leading the tournament in guys named Rok

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Old
05-05-2013, 05:32 PM
  #15
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2, 5, 9, 10, 15, and 16 were funny.

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Old
05-05-2013, 07:28 PM
  #16
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tritsche View Post
AUSTRIA
Clone Vanek before it's too late
hah hah hah.

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Old
05-05-2013, 08:36 PM
  #17
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Oi! I thought we're the main event m8!

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Old
05-06-2013, 12:28 AM
  #18
Reznor
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Good one for Canada too

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Old
05-06-2013, 12:41 AM
  #19
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Can't stop 20 Americans with one Rochester American

True.

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Old
05-06-2013, 09:19 AM
  #20
Jaymond Flurrie
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I like these a lot. Takes a bit of inside knowledge to understand them all (like Antti and Canucks - sure, you all know it is about Niemi, but that is inside info).

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Old
05-06-2013, 09:23 AM
  #21
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jaymond Flurrie View Post
I like these a lot. Takes a bit of inside knowledge to understand them all (like Antti and Canucks - sure, you all know it is about Niemi, but that is inside info).
Yeah, and slovakia hates Raanta =)

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Old
05-06-2013, 10:06 AM
  #22
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Quote:
Is America ready for an openly gold medal-contending team?

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Old
05-06-2013, 10:07 AM
  #23
Jaymond Flurrie
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Quote:
Originally Posted by QnebO View Post
Yeah, and slovakia hates Raanta =)
Well that's easy, you need to only follow the World Championships and that alone is enough to explain it. But for Canucks/Antti, the answer has to be searched from elsewhere.

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Old
05-07-2013, 05:01 PM
  #24
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1.



SWITZERLAND
Two words: "Big Eight."


2.



RUSSIA
So after France, that's 14 straight...oops, sorry


3.



CANADA
Playing Norway boosts our self-esteem, eh?


4.



FINLAND
It wasn’t as pretty as Miss Finland, but we’ll take it


5.



SWEDEN
Our team is so good Forsberg and Lidström have to sit in the stands


6.



USA
If this was 2012, McKayla would not be impressed


7.



CZECH REPUBLIC
Well, we beat the Swiss 19-1 in 1972, so there!


8.



SLOVAKIA
To honour his feat, the Zamboni shall be renamed the Zaborsky


9.



NORWAY
Just wait till Don Cherry hears you ran up the score


10.



FRANCE
Finland scores better, we cook better – vive la difference!


11.



BELARUS
Three days off: breakfast, bag skate, lunch, pushups...


12.



AUSTRIA
Basically, our moms are happy


13.



DENMARK
That’ll teach Slovenia to knock us out of the Olympics


14.



GERMANY
So, how about that Champions League final?


15.



LATVIA
Oh, schnitzel!


16.



SLOVENIA
Nice celly, Morten Yakupov

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Old
05-07-2013, 06:02 PM
  #25
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kiluj View Post


5.



SWEDEN
Our team is so good Forsberg and Lidström have to sit in the stands
oh my, that's awesome. Especially when you consider that this team sucks so bad.

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