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WGR - Matt Barnaby Arrested in Amherst

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05-15-2011, 09:13 AM
  #26
joshjull
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Originally Posted by vcv View Post
Sure, the people involved in the "argument".

If one of them gets an order of protection and the other continues to harass them, yes.

There is no clear line for emotional abuse because the burden of proof for such is higher and emotional abuse is almost never ever an isolated incident, where as physical abuse can be.

Emotional abuse is very dangerous because there isn't that line. Victims of such find it much easier to justify the other persons behavior. It has a far more reaching impact than physical.

Anyway, the whole point of this is... if his ex (girlfriend?) had an order of protection on him (I'm assuming there's no children involved here) and he still contacted her and harassed her or her friends, he is still a *******.
Couple of things

1) in the last few months he and his wife have decided to seperate and get divorced. She isn't his ex-wife just yet.

2) yes there are kids involved.

3) there was no order of protection. Barnaby and his wife had agreed he would stay away from the marital home. Dont recall the legal name for that.

4) his soon to be ex has a male "friend".

I'm not condoning what he did. But considering how emotionally charged a divorce can be, particularly with kids involved and a male "friend". I can understand that it wouldn't take much to set someone off in that situation.

It's easy to be judgmental on the outside looking in with no emotional attachment. I've had friends and co-workers go through divorces where the level of hate and bitterness that developed between the parties involved was incredible. With each side doing whatever they could to inflict punishment (emotional, financial, etc.) on the other in any way they could. Many of these folks I considered pretty level headed in life but when it came to the ex, rational thought went out the window.

Barnaby may very well be the a-hole in this situation. It just seems posters are too quick to jump on that bandwagon.

I just feel bad for their kids. Divorces suck for kids even when they are amicable. In this case they have to deal with everyone knowing their parentsdirty laundry.


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Old
05-15-2011, 10:52 AM
  #27
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Originally Posted by joshjull View Post

I'm not condoning what he did. But considering how emotionally charged a divorce can be, particularly with kids involved and a male "friend". I can understand that it wouldn't take much to set someone off in that situation.

It's easy to be judgmental on the outside looking in with no emotional attachment. I've had friends and co-workers go through divorces where the level of hate and bitterness that developed between the parties involved was incredible. With each side doing whatever they could to inflict punishment (emotional, financial, etc.) on the other in any way they could. Many of these folks I considered pretty level headed in life but when it came to the ex, rational thought went out the window.

Barnaby may very well be the a-hole in this situation. It just seems posters are too quick to jump on that bandwagon.

I just feel bad for their kids. Divorces suck for kids even when they are amicable. In this case they have to deal with everyone knowing their parents dirty laundry.
Spot on, Great post. IMO

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05-15-2011, 11:32 AM
  #28
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Originally Posted by joshjull View Post
Couple of things

1) in the last few months he and his wife have decided to seperate and get divorced. She isn't his ex-wife just yet.

2) yes there are kids involved.

3) there was no order of protection. Barnaby and his wife had agreed he would stay away from the marital home. Dont recall the legal name for that.

4) his soon to be ex has a male "friend".
Since my assumptions were wrong, then I agree with you completely.

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Old
05-16-2011, 04:23 PM
  #29
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Spot on, Great post. IMO
X2..

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Old
05-17-2011, 11:45 AM
  #30
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I can certainly respect the "innocent until proven guilty" theory, but to give him a pass on this given the state of things is crazy IMO. While you can feel bad for his situation with his family and debate degrees of abuse, you can't IMO sweep away what he was charged with: felony criminal mischief, criminal contempt, criminal trespass, harassment and aggravated harassment. This is serious and cops don't bring these charges in unwarranted circumstances. People get hurt when restraining orders are violated; it is why law enforcement takes them so seriously.

He needs to grow up and do what's right for his family...his juvenile, ex-athlete persona doesn't work when you get into your forties...

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Old
05-17-2011, 01:17 PM
  #31
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This thread really has no where positive to go from here.

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